Having a great time with kids this weekend. Took them shopping, spent money that I need to be saving but I know that they needed school clothes and their mom wont do it. So I stepped up. It does feel good to have enough of an income to be able to do something like this. A month ago I wouldn't have been able to. We went to movie last night also.
Matthew drove me nuts, he thinks he knows what fits and he insists on particular brands just like when he was little, totally inflexible. Much of that is his autistic tendencies rearing their heads, but I have no patience for it and found myself yelling at him. He looked hurt and upset and I felt like crap afterward. So I bought him a few things he wanted and some ice cream and he seemed happy again. Lauren said she couldn't deal with the two of us so went off on her own for awhile. It all ended up OK.
I could really use more than 1 day off, I am so tired out! But tomorrow I am back to it. I have a woman flying in tomorrow to do training with my new staff and my regional comes in Tuesday to spend the week so I need to be Mr. Professional and on my best behavior all week. Then next week I am on my own and the week after we open and someone is flying in for that week to assist me with that as I have a staff of about 20 and all but 4 of them are brand new. Then, finally, things should get to normal and I will get my 2 days off a week. So 2-3 more weeks. I can do this!
Lauren drove on the interstate Friday and today on I-240 to the mall today. Only a couple of what could have been disastrous errors. Otherwise she did great.
That's all I got for today. See ya!
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Peace
I seek peace. Contentment. This has been my quest for awhile now. I have decided that I will not permit assholes to deter me from my quest. There are going to be people who think they have a clue. They don`t. See the problem is all these "open minded" people, or "non judgemental" people..they are full of shit. Everybody makes a judgement on people. EVERYBODY. If you don't then your brain dead. Its what we do. The person WE are, is what determines how we judge others.
Did ya get that?? Let me reiterate. We pass judgement on others. Good or bad. If we pass a bad, or negative judgement on someone..without good reason (in my book, PERSONAL evidence/knowledge of something that is no doubt or FAR beyond a reasonable doubt true), then WE (as the person passing negative judgement) have the problem. WE are the ones who's thinking is twisted. Those who qualify their statements with, "I am no one to judge, BUT...."
Fuck these holier than thou pieces of human excrement. Karma baby..gotta believe. What comes around, goes around. Whatever suffering/misery you get, you have coming to you. So sad for you.
So, as I was saying, I will allow the miserable wretches to be just that. I will find happiness, peace and contentment despite their efforts.
Or I will die trying.
Did ya get that?? Let me reiterate. We pass judgement on others. Good or bad. If we pass a bad, or negative judgement on someone..without good reason (in my book, PERSONAL evidence/knowledge of something that is no doubt or FAR beyond a reasonable doubt true), then WE (as the person passing negative judgement) have the problem. WE are the ones who's thinking is twisted. Those who qualify their statements with, "I am no one to judge, BUT...."
Fuck these holier than thou pieces of human excrement. Karma baby..gotta believe. What comes around, goes around. Whatever suffering/misery you get, you have coming to you. So sad for you.
So, as I was saying, I will allow the miserable wretches to be just that. I will find happiness, peace and contentment despite their efforts.
Or I will die trying.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
I`m baaaack! At least I think so
Whew! The past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind. I don't even know where to begin! The good or the bad? Guess I`ll lead off with the good.
Training in Spartanburg was very long but I must admit productive. Yesterday was day#1 in the new store and OMG its awesome!. As nice as the 2 story monster @ the mall is, this store is even nicer. Whoever designs these things, give him/her a raise! It was odd walking in as a manager. We started working on the plexiglass shelving shipments, signage, office supplies... and I asked what do you need me to do? and was told, keep these people working and on task. Not long ago it would have been, unloading freight and taking out the trash! So that was cool. I feel back in my element as my management career spans back into the mid 1980`s.
I also received a partial paycheck as I am now bi weekly. So one week was at the old and another at the new. Man, that was sweet. I so needed this is almost hard to believe. My bank account will actually have a positive balance. Unbelievable. After all thats happened I would say that for being back just 1 year, almost exactly, I have done pretty damn good.
Of course I am fearful that my past could come back to get me, but I wont live my life paranoid about that. I will simply keep pushing forward. So hooray for me!
The bad part. Last Monday night I was staying in Spartanburg, about 30 minutes from the kids. Matthew had a practice that evening and the freshman parents had to provide dinner. This meant me and Jodi attending. This is not a good thing and as much as I tried for civility..well, that lasted maybe an hour or so. Things turned ugly, I ended up at her house later that evening yelling, she was going to call the police..that would have been VERY, VERY bad for me. So I screwed up yet again and allowed myself to be sucked into the craziness of Jodi world. I will never learn. This could have been disastrous. I cannot allow that to happen again. I will not allow that woman to destroy me AGAIN. I allowed once...thats enough for one lifetime.
Anywho. Next week is truck week. That means every single piece of merchandise we sell will be received and put out between Tuesday and Friday morning. Almost a quarter MILLION books alone. Not to mention all the other crap we stock. So it will be intense. But rewarding.
Training in Spartanburg was very long but I must admit productive. Yesterday was day#1 in the new store and OMG its awesome!. As nice as the 2 story monster @ the mall is, this store is even nicer. Whoever designs these things, give him/her a raise! It was odd walking in as a manager. We started working on the plexiglass shelving shipments, signage, office supplies... and I asked what do you need me to do? and was told, keep these people working and on task. Not long ago it would have been, unloading freight and taking out the trash! So that was cool. I feel back in my element as my management career spans back into the mid 1980`s.
I also received a partial paycheck as I am now bi weekly. So one week was at the old and another at the new. Man, that was sweet. I so needed this is almost hard to believe. My bank account will actually have a positive balance. Unbelievable. After all thats happened I would say that for being back just 1 year, almost exactly, I have done pretty damn good.
Of course I am fearful that my past could come back to get me, but I wont live my life paranoid about that. I will simply keep pushing forward. So hooray for me!
The bad part. Last Monday night I was staying in Spartanburg, about 30 minutes from the kids. Matthew had a practice that evening and the freshman parents had to provide dinner. This meant me and Jodi attending. This is not a good thing and as much as I tried for civility..well, that lasted maybe an hour or so. Things turned ugly, I ended up at her house later that evening yelling, she was going to call the police..that would have been VERY, VERY bad for me. So I screwed up yet again and allowed myself to be sucked into the craziness of Jodi world. I will never learn. This could have been disastrous. I cannot allow that to happen again. I will not allow that woman to destroy me AGAIN. I allowed once...thats enough for one lifetime.
Anywho. Next week is truck week. That means every single piece of merchandise we sell will be received and put out between Tuesday and Friday morning. Almost a quarter MILLION books alone. Not to mention all the other crap we stock. So it will be intense. But rewarding.
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