Blah, blah, blah.....

I`ve been neglectful of my little blog, but once again my friend Miriam made mention of her blog and I was reminded. As sometimes this is cathartic for me, I figured I would post today.
Whats new? Nothing good. Lots of suckiness. New word. Suckiness. Lets see where to begin?
Ok, discovered I could come up with plenty of money to start or buy a business and float it for about a year. However, after that I`d be broke and the fact is that after much research I have determined that any business would take a minimum of 36 months before I could pull a decent salary out of it. Could be profitable in 9-18 months, but profitable PLUS paying me decently, that would take a bit and I simply cannot go into debt of around $300,000, which is realistically what I would need to do to purchase/startup, build a business and support me for 3 yrs. Thats just too much of a note to be paying down and would suck funds right off the bottom line. So back to the job search. Yuck.
Gave up my place. In all fairness it rents for $1300/mo. and I can about afford $300 right now. SO I have moved into the guest room at my parents house. Nice house. Lots of room. And if this isnt very temporary, until I`m working again, I WILL kill myself. Because while I`m giving my space and all..still. This blows. I`m hoping within 90 days I find something and can get back out on my own again. Because again, if not I will have to end my life.
Suckiness.
Need to sell the BMW that Jodi, in her infinite wisdom, purchased. I`ll sell it and buy Lauren a car. She has earned it for her junior year.
I am watching my bank out go the wrong direction. Have burned through $1000, above my unemployment check, in the past 8 weeks. Not good. I need to radically ratchet down my spending to more match my income. Yeah, right. Like thats gonna happen.
I have no life. I have become a loner, a hermit. I do nothing. I have little. Outside of my children. I still have the dad gig at least.
Well this was cheery just to write.